"The Grace Period": overcoming the feeling of excessive freedom...

Linkedin-merchant (definition #3)

NOUN

1. Someone who tries to twist an obvious holiday into something productive for the sake of trying to impress their ambivalent network.

• Me, a bemused scroller: "They said that they're looking forward to a restful summer in which they hope to recharge before a productive Q4. I've seen them on Instagram with a pint in each hand at Parklife. They are such a Linkedin-merchant!"

Dear Network,

Prospects.ac suggest four possible pathways for a student after they finish university:

1. Get a graduate job.

2. Become self-employed.

3. Pursue a post-graduate degree.

4. Take a gap year.

Astute advice I'm sure, if not severely limited. Nevertheless, what no one seems to talk about is the subject of the "Grace Period" or as a politics-nut or at least American as strange as me may call it, the "Lame Duck Session".

I speak to you today, very much at the end of my "Grace Period". Two lads holidays and one family holiday down, and my finances dwindling, I have just finished my first week stacking shelves at Tesco (other supermarkets available) in an attempt to collect some funds for my new-found (and unfortunately financial) independence and somewhat uncertain travel plans.

To me, the "Grace Period" refers to the month or even two months after exams finish and the days stretch out in front of you, the possibilities endless. Some stay at uni, drinking-in (perhaps literally) the freedom and living off the dregs of the student loan, some start their job ASAP, Infernos and Clapham do beckon after all. Some will return home, their new found freedom proving to be all too much and their lack of funds sending them back to their part time job, and, finally, some go off on holiday...

These events can happen in any combination and in any order, and none of them are particularly problematic. However, I think we all share two common feelings throughout the "Grace Period".

1. Dread

2. An excess of freedom

Remaining aware that I seem to try and coin meaningless phrases each time I write, I feel that the idea of being excessively free relates to the somewhat paradoxical experience of feeling that your next steps are completely your choice, to the point where you feel so overwhelmed that it's as if you can't do anything at all. A quote from a text conversation I had with a friend of mine today sums this sensation up well.

It's hardly surprising though, right? We've lived our whole lives under constraints and rules according to our education systems. Whatever kind of schooling you experienced, your timetable, assignments and extra-curriculars underpin your existence and, if nothing else, give at least some sense of structure and direction. The loss of these constraints leaves both our immediate and distant futures stretching out ahead of us filled with only ifs, buts and maybes. We fill our time with hasty and impulsive short term plans to fill the void we see before us.

In an attempt to disguise the dread for the sake of, well, no one really, the Linkedin merchants will crawl out of the woodwork. Those that we don't all envy with their internships, grad jobs and online courses create posts with buzzwords like, 'restful', 'rejuvenating' and 'recharge' as their parents and fellow LM's congratulate them on nothing in particular. These are arguably the pinnacle of unnecessary posting and I think everybody knows that. But we're insecure, the working world is tough and you never know who's watching your Linkedin activity whilst you commit the cardinal sin of taking a few weeks to chill after 15+ years of full time education.

As with all of these posts, I understand that care must be taken as I am almost certainly over-cynical. This blog itself, when you strip it back, is a carefully orchestrated productivity ploy that I will undoubtedly put on my CV and reference in interviews down the line, when in reality I'm doing very little myself. I might even use my Linkedin to promote it.

"One should examine oneself for a very long time before thinking of condemining others" - Molière

Away from the pretentious inclusion of quotes like that, I guess what I'm trying to say is let's drop the act. Why do we have to dress up this time in our lives as something productive when what we need more than anything is to just stop? We don't need to pretend that we're living the kind of dream summer that everyone hypes it up to be. We especially don't need to be interacting with our Linkedin networks either. The "Grace Period" should be a 'rejuvenating' and 'relaxing' time without the exhausting and constant comparisons that we see amongst people our age, especially when half the posts are complete waffle. There is really no roadmap for this time, and there's something great in that. I may be both wrong and at risk of sounding like an Instagram "life coach" here, but by accepting the lack of direction, maybe an excess of freedom won't make us feel so trapped!

So however you're spending/have spent your "Grace Period", just know that we all feel the same dread and the constraints of our freedom. See you in the next one!

Your favourite secret LM,

AT