New year, same merchants: New Year's Resolutions that you'll definitely stick to in 2024...

Linkedin-Merchant (definition #13)

NOUN

1. Someone who sets outlandish and seemingly unachievable New Year's Resolutions for their network's viewing pleasure. The 4:00am runs will last 48 hours.

• My feed this week: "New Year, new horizons, new challenges. Get ready! Here are my resolutions going into 2024!

Dear Network,

I hope you all had an enjoyable and restful holiday season and are feeling "recharged and ready for Q1". Apologies for the radio silence over the past few weeks. To be honest, I have been really stuck on one particular post that I feel has potential but I'm struggling to find the words to express it well enough. I will try and push that one out ASAP! I also wanted to prioritise enjoying my last few weeks in Canada and I took some eventful but beautiful trips to Halifax and Mont Tremblant before flying home and enjoying the festive period with my family. It's very much a "back to reality" feeling and it's been something of an adjustment!

If you're like me, and get the feeling that next year will be "your year", or have been unfortunate enough to stumble onto Linkedin over the past 48 hours, then you will have seen the growing discourse about New Year's Resolutions which takes place annually in a competition to gain feelings of superiority over our peers. So you run to your notes app, with notions of a complete transformation, fame, fortune and a long term committed relationship with the person you're going to marry, only to find that a few week's later, you haven't stayed completely consistent. By this I mean that Dry January is out the window, your goals were rather unrealistic and you feel like a complete failure.

I think especially with people in like us in this transitional phase of life (LM jargon), these resolutions can be a particularly difficult topic and the pressure feels a little higher to be productive going into 2024. After all, "'Tis the season for comparison!" (the title of my Christmas Special that I never finished) and many of your friends will be seemingly well-established in their houseshare in Clapham, Balham or Tooting and firmly settled in to the corporate lifestyle, marvelling at their Infernos' nights and the notion of disposable income.

It is this feeling (that I feel intensely) that has inspired the post this week and so I want to get into how we can best structure our year whilst we are stuck in this strange limbo we find ourselves in and how we can break the classic cycle of unfulfilled resolutions! I would love to hear your input and feedback on this one as I feel like it's something we can all share.

Red underwear on, 12 grapes in hand, let's go...

The drastic lifestyle change

We've all been there...

After the frivolity of the holiday season, we see a "no weights, instant results!!!!!" abs work out come across our For You Page at 3am. The productive grindset king/queen inside you decides that there's no time like the present and, before you know it, you've woken up your whole house trying to do the first burpee you've done since year 10 PE. Alternatively, you might join the rest of the gym newbies in your freshly ordered Gymshark and Lululemon, armed with a year-long commitment and a subscription to Strava premium and your newly installed bedroom whiteboard indicates the ungodly hours you'll be waking up before your 9-5 to become South Wales' answer to Eddie Hall.

This phenomenon may not be strictly fitness related though, with your pledge to read 50 books by June battles with the fact that you never even finished 'The Crucible' in school and got lucky with the exam question, result.

There are endless examples of these types of resolution and, in principle, they're not a million miles away. A desire for self improvement and a healthier physical and mental lifestyle is definitely a sentiment to be considered when formulating your goals for the year ahead. However, it is much more important to stay realistic and this introduces a theme that is going to run through this post, and that's being kind to yourself. The absolute key to failure is setting a goal that requires you to completely transform your lifestyle and push you so far out of your comfort zone so quickly that it is simply not realistic to fulfil it (in the majority of cases). This will lead to you feeling like a complete failure when you fail to fulfil expectations that are almost completely unrealistic. At the other end of the spectrum, another issue that comes with these resolutions is accountability and your goal being too vague. For example:

"get fitter"

"read more"

So how do we strike a balance?

Principally, the point of this section is to demonstrate that, however genuine our intentions might be, it is really important to create an attainable but measurable goal. I know I probably sound like the school career coach that told you that you could do anything you put your mind to but it is somewhat true. Just because you see idiots on Linkedin reflecting on how much they claim to have achieved in the last year doesn't mean you have to compete and try and do something as drastic as they likely pretended to do. Think about what you'd like to improve and break it down into small steps. One or maximum two of these should be your resolutions for 2024.

It all boils down to a question of perspective and this can be what leads to unrealistic goal setting. It's so important to celebrate and set goals for self improvement that conform to your expectations and personality. This really depends on the type of person you are and comparison is the thief of joy in this context more than any other. Whether it's running a marathon, couch to 5k or even just taking a walk once a day, they are all equal markers of growth and should be considered as such. If you pick something tailored to you, rather than societal expectations, you'll be infinitely more likely to succeed.

The other aspect of this is accountability. Having something concrete to work towards can certainly help, whether it's an event like a race or even a specific book you are going to read rather than the less specific "read a book". I know that I am inherently quite lazy so introducing deadlines and events that I am forced to prepare for really helps me to focus (hence the half marathon I am booking for March for whatever reason).

Embracing Setbacks

This is probably the biggest cause of my personal inability to keep to resolutions.

I think we create this idea that in order for the resolution to be successful, we have to be completely perfect from January 1st all the way until we adorn the red underwear once again on our hastily planned night out before we make another list of hairbrained resolutions. This is absolutely not the case. Failures and setbacks are part of the changes you are willing to make and expecting to be perfect all the time will prevent you from pushing forward through those errors. It might seem obvious but it's important to be kind to yourself and not beat yourself up when you make an error. Take a moment to reflect on what went wrong. Identify any patterns or triggers, but don't dwell on the negativity. Use it as a catalyst for improvement.

Equally, part of being kind to yourself is celebrating progress. However small those steps are, be proud of yourself and celebrate!.

Overemphasis on professional life

Away from generic, unsolicited life advice, this one is a bit more specific to the limbo dwellers like myself. Given where we are in our lives, there may feel some level of pressure to establish yourself professionally or, according to your parents, "get your life together".

Of course, finding a job and moving to Balham can be on the agenda but I'm begging you not to let it define your year. As we mention weekly in this blog, the process takes so much time and effort and it's normal to not get something straight away. Don't jump into something that you don't really want to do or isn't a good fit for the sake of getting out of your hometown. This was the experience of a friend of mine that started in London in September, he left a role in recruiting after just a week as it simply wasn't for him. He told me that part of him already knew that, but was so hellbent on getting up to London. Take your time, find something that inspires you, and don't restrict yourself to what you "think you should do". Developing your mental and physical wellbeing, as well as prioritising learning and expanding your mind is equally as valid as any professional goals.

If you are already in employment and you are going into your second year, it's still important not to put too much pressure on yourself. Again, speaking to another friend of mine, they feel under immense pressure to solidify their career path. It's so important to remember that we are still incredibly young and new to the workforce and taking it a day at a time as you grow into a role and trusting the process is a good approach. Some good potential resolutions that aren't so pressurised could be to go into the office more if you work hybrid (and of course if it suits your style), attending work social events or enhancing your routine to improve your work-life balance. Having work-specific targets is great too, but don't underestimate the importance of reviewing your approach to professional life.

Takeaways

As much as this post might feel generic and a little obvious to some (you have probably seen many merchants writing posts like this), I think it's important for people in our situation to not feel too much anxiety and tension going into a new year. We shouldn't feel pressured to turn our lives around in the space of a year and create a long term career path.

Perfection is not a requirement for personal development and setbacks are all part of growing. Comparison is the thief of joy and as we mention a lot on this blog, you need to run your own race. Looking back on the year just gone too, take time to celebrate your successes as well as identifying potential areas or improvement as, frankly, you deserve it. For people in the same cohort as me, you may have graduated from uni, managed to go solo-travelling, or even held down a part time job. Be kind to yourself.

Professional growth will come, and working on your mindset and approach to your everyday life will facilitate the changes you want to see in the workplace. To achieve these changes though, accountability is key.

I have had a great year this year and starting this blog back in May has been a great way to document it and occupy my mind. I am so happy that you guys have taken the time to read and give some great feedback over the past few months, it really means a lot and I hope to carry this on in 2024. I feel like being consistent helped me create higher quality content so I hope to stay that way! This year will certainly be a year of change for me and I hope you'll follow along with me as I navigate adult life for the first full year.

Happy New Year, merchants! Let's make 2024 the best yet, see you in the next one.

Your favourite LM,

AT

As a complete illustration of me not taking my own advice, here is my list for the year! Hope you can all have a laugh.